Thank God That's Over

Well at least I would thank God if I believed in one. It's New Year's Eve and I can't remember being so glad to see the back of a year as I am to see the end of 2008. Tonight Marion and I will be celebrating in the usual way by going to bed before midnight and trying to get to sleep before the fireworks start going off. Whilst that may make me sound pretty boring and grumpy I can't think of anybody else that I would want to be with other than the kids who are at opposite ends of the country and I can't remember a decent New Year's Eve party since we had a fancy dress one about 30 years ago. I suppose we could drop into the now famous Lounge Inn in Bold St but I imagine that since the recent free publicity courtesy of Stevie G it will be packed to the rafters and playing Phil Collins all night.

Yes we had a bit of excitement in Southport on Monday and Tuesday with the Steviegate affair. I was driving son Paul to the station at Preston when I heard the news so I popped by the Police Station on the way back to find it deserted but for a lone paparazzo. However 12 hours later it was packed with photographers.There were film crews camped outside Tesco Garage and I think it was Dave Guest who beat me to their last Finest Roast Beef and Horseradish sandwich.

It beats me how someone getting a couple of stitches and a tooth knocked out finds its way onto the national news. Blimey Southport should be making headline news every day as the local papers don't have enough room to print all the night club fights that happen every week. And as for the press speculation that Gerrard could get 5 years! The most I have seen locally for a similar offence is six months for a persistent offender. If Stevie G is guilty it is a first offence apart from the bit of shoplifting when he was a kid that he mentions in his book and, IF he is guilty, the most he should expect is community service. I hope it doesn't cause too much distraction as Liverpool' performance on Monday was sublime and why they are not favourites to win the Premiership is beyond me. I bet £400 on them a few weeks ago and have now laid some of it so I win £1000 if they lift the Premiership and lose about £250 if they don't. I may lay some more depending on how the Stoke game goes on 10th Jan. If the odds drop below 3 I could make a good profit.

I am writing this at work although we are officially closed. I came in today and yesterday to see how many of the people whose cheques were "in the post" before Christmas were telling the truth. Answer-none. It looks like 2009 is going to start like 2008 finished. I was glad that I came in as we had a FAX from a customer with a problem boiler and I am pleased to say that I was able to help him fix it very easily.

Our local computer wizard Graham is with me at the moment doing a health check on all the PCS whilst we are closed. He is just doing a few tweaks but it seems to be speeding them up nicely.

Anyway I would like to wish any readers a very very happy and successful 2009 and let's all put 2008 behind us.

Instanta Blog Awards 2008

As the year draws to a close I thought that it would be good to hand out a few awards so here is a mishmash of both my own and Instanta's best and worst of 2008.

Customer of the Year

I might as well start with this the most difficult of all to choose. There have been so many candidates including the old industry stalwarts, C&C Catering, Caterware, Keemlaw, Old Ford Catering, Lloyds, South Coast Catering, Allsop & Pitts and John Garner from the CEDABOND stable. There are first rate wholesalers R H Hall, Nisbets and the Wolesley Group and genuine internet dealers ABC Direct and Aquahot but in the end, despite the boss being an ardent Chelsea fan, I am giving the award to Carford Group. It is rare to find such a professional set up in any industry let alone this one and I get the feeling that Carfords share our aim of achieving high standards of customer service through lashings of integrity, attention to detail and being pleasant to deal with. Thanks Nick. A truly excellent business. Visit their website here

Service Company Of The Year

We closed our service department a few years ago as there were simply not enough faulty boilers to justify the cost of keeping it open. Since then we have continued to develop a network of independent engineers who cover the whole country for us. We have particularly enjoyed working with Jonathan from PB Hayhurst, Hans from Apolon, Dave from Quality Catering Maintenance, Leon from Surelink,Ian at Blackpool Catering, Tony from Cater-Tech Liverpool and Tom from North Brighton but my award has to go to David and Amanda Sweeney of City Servicing in Essex. It is hard enough to service boilers in any city centre but to cope with the logistical nightmare that is London and to carry out the work so quickly, efficiently and friendlily is an amazing achievement. So thanks Dave, Amanda and your team. And come on you Hammers.

City Servicing
Unit 2 Rectory Road Globe Industrial Estate, Grays, Essex RM17 6ST
p: 01375380165 f: 01375392228

Film of the Year

Marion and I love nothing better than a good film. And we have seen plenty this year. High on the list are the Coen brothers "No Country for Old Men" a masterful piece of cinematography and Clint Eastwood's recent "Changeling" a fascinating tale of police ineptitude wonderfully told. But for sheer joy, innocence and happiness my award goes to "Juno" a truly feelgood movie in a feel bad year.



Most Costly Mistake Of The Year

No contest. It may have cost Liverpool millions but it cost me a bet of £650. Although on the positive side it saved me a trip to bloody Moscow.


Worst Christmas Cracker Ever

Marion went for a Christmas lunch with her friend Jane on Saturday. I know that times are hard but just take a look at the cracker that came with the meal. The restaurant shall remain nameless although it goes without saying that it was not our favourite Warehouse. The hat is two inches tall, the gift is a tiny purple plastic pair of lips and the joke? "How do you get rid of a boomerang? Throw it down a one way street." WTF I know that cracker jokes are supposed to be groan inducing but I think I could be funnier just putting down a few words at random. The sky is blue but at least there are partridges in heaven.



Best TV Show of the Year

Regular readers know that me and Marion don't get out much so telly is a popular pastime. Next year there can only be one winner, Chris Tarrant's new game show "The Colour of Money" developed by our son Paul but this year, whilst Paul's "Are you an Egghead" was a good show, it was not his original idea. Our own favourites included magnificent costume dramas like "Tess" and "The Devil's Whore", "X Factor" as always, the fabulous and sometimes outlandish "Beautiful People" and recently "Outnumbered" and the broodingly menacing but beautifully filmed "Wallander". But my award goes to "Harry Hill's TV Burp". Harry's brilliant take on the week's tv is simply excellent on every level. Where else could you see my hero the Pogues' Shane McGowan signing "Fairytale of New York" - with a whale?



Employee of the Year

It would be wrong to single out anybody from our workforce for this accolade as they have almost all put in a fantastic effort and managed to increase production despite the introduction of a completely new range of equipment. Our R&D team has produced the finest range of machines that we have ever had in our 50 year existence and our spares department has managed to hit all targets for getting spares out on time. We have met all our quality initiatives and our Environmental Management System has done its bit for the world. Our sales team has managed to increase sales in extremely difficult times and our office staff have treated customers courteously and given them an excellent service. Our buyer has helped us to control costs and our credit controllers have kept on top of the situation in the face of criticism that has sometimes bordered on abuse. Well done everyone. Keep it up in 2009 and we'll beat the recession.

Here's a song for Christmas.


What? You didn't expect something Christmasy from a sworn atheist did you?

Liz Iz Off Again

I'm not around for the rest of today so will leave today's blog short but sweet.

This week we say goodbye once more to Liz Clayton who came to our rescue in the office by helping out for the last few months of Nat's maternity leave. Natalie will be back with us on 2nd January so it's a sad farewell to Liz. Liz worked for us before she left for her own maternity leave and it has been a real pleasure having her back. It is rare to find someone with such a good nature and in these times of dog eat dog it has been wonderful for us all in the office to work with someone so genuinely nice. Do keep in touch Liz. You never know when we might need another helping hand.

As one chapter closes another opens and we are, of course, all very excited to be welcoming back child prodigy and young mum Natalie Drummond. Her stand ins have both been excellent so she's got a lot to live up to. But we're sure that she will do us proud.

Come back tomorrow for the Instanta Blog 2008 Awards

Amelia Mercer One Today

Here is little Amelia daughter of machine operator Craig Mercer and granddaughter of factory leader Tony Mercer. Amelia turns one today. I hope that she has a super day. I can still remember Paul and Sarah's own first birthdays and their attempts to grasp the concept of blowing out a candle. Happy birthday Amelia.

Sir Elton Rocks

I said yesterday that Marion and I were not particularly fans of Elton John but, after last night's Red Piano show at the Echo Arena , we are now. His Las Vegas show has been brought over to the UK for the first time and it is a real musical and visual spectacular. Elton's performance is powerful and note perfect and his backing group prove that you're never too old to rock and roll. I was not too sure about the gigantic inflatable banana(flanked by two enormous cherries) and the mustard oozing hot dog but perhaps here's a guy who just enjoys his food.The show was performed against a backdrop of incredible moving images and finished with some of the audience welcomed onto the stage joining in Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting. A totally excellent show.

Back at Instanta we are starting to wind the factory down for two weeks. We've got the Christmas lunch on Tuesday afternoon but apart from that, the lads will be away now until Monday 5th. The office will be open until lunchtime on Christmas Eve. We are re-opening the office on Friday 2nd January. I know that a lot of offices are closing until the following Monday but we want to make sure that the customers get the very best service and are not affected by too long a shutdown.




It's been a strange end to the year. After all the successes of our new product launch at Excel back in February we had the setback of the thief in the factory and the last three months have been a catalogue of customers going bust. Coupled with the bank's marvellous interest rate hedge that means we pay a rate over a base rate of 6.75% rather than 2% we are looking forward to a fresh new year with plenty of good news and signs of the green shoots of recovery. Our sales for the first three months of our year to 30th November still show a small growth on last year so we must be doing something right.

We just raffled off all the gifts that our suppliers kindly sent us this year. We had quite a lot of bottles and are really grateful for the generosity shown. We like everybody, not just the bosses, to share the suppliers' kindness so every one's name (except mine) goes into the hat and we draw them out.

The doctor increased my blood pressure medication and changed the timing for taking the tablets yesterday so I hope that I will have a low blood pressure Christmas. I just hope it doesn't go too far the other way and I end up keeling over and fainting.

Anyway before I go. Here's Sir Elton's bananas filmed by someone on a mobile phone.

Another One Bites The Dust

I had a day off yesterday and went to the Yorkshire Dales to visit a few farmers who let me metal detect on their land and give them a bottle of wine for Christmas. At the last farm I decided to have a few hours detecting but within thirty seconds of walking into the field found myself covered in mud having unwittingly stepped into some sort of bog. I managed to dry out enough to have a pleasant few hours in beautiful countryside but only managed to find an old knife and a few of the farmer's .22 bullet cases.



Sadly my escape from work didn't last the full day as I decided to pay a visit to a slow paying customer on the way back. Whilst en route I whiled away the time trying to conjure up excuses for Instanta's managing director turning up on the doorstep covered from head to toe in thick red crud. Sadly, I didn't get the opportunity to use the excuses as the premises were vacant and the neighbours told me the customer had gone bust. Another one bites the dust. That's two in the last seven days.Paranoia is starting to set in. Every order is treated with suspicion (especially if it's not a regular customer)and the number of cheques that must be "delayed in the Christmas post" is frightening. We can read postmarks you know.

The bad thing about the credit control is the sheer nastiness that we get from late payers. All we are saying is "Can you please tell us when you are going to pay your account which is overdue? Or "Sorry we can't let you have any more goods until you account is straight". If we ever became late payers ourselves our own response to such calls would be "We are very sorry. We'll get back to to you straight away with a payment date" . But what do we get? "Huh. We're not buying anything else off you!""You are blackmailing us" we even got "You must be scared" It seems that in the world of the late payer, the supplier is always wrong. I thought I'd try it out myself so I went to Tesco last night for some Xmas shopping. I told them I'll pay you in a few weeks or I'm not buying anything off you again ever. A nice young man escorted me to the car park sans shopping.



Marion and I are off to see Elton John at the Liverpool Echo Arena tonight. We aren't huge fans but his music was part of the soundtrack to our teens and, if he plays his old stuff it could be a bit of a nostalgic evening for us.Mind you, I read that he had a go at X Factor during his concert a the O2 Arena on Saturday. Watch it Elton there are a lot of X Factor fans out there. I'll finish with an appropriate song for today from the same era.

Good Luck To Workhouse

Marion and I went to the grand opening of the new studio at Workhouse Creative Marketing in Ribchester yesterday. Mark Jones (above) and his wife Nita have created a superb add-on to their design studio.This new building incorporates a massive infinity screen photographic studio,a green screen set up, a studio set and many further facilities. In addition they have taken on a hugely talented young photographer for in house work. As you can see from my photo above, that photographer has no competition from me (something to do with the green screen washing it out). Marion and I would like to wish Mark & Nita every success with this bold venture. Workhouse are a brilliant design studio and come highly recommended. If you've seen our latest brochure you will see why. Check them out here

Back at Instanta we are keenly awaiting some good news. It seems like an eternity since anything nice happened. Yesterday the Guardian published a letter from me in which I railed at the way in which administrators are selling goods off at knock down prices. This stuff is often not paid for and it really rubs salt into the wound when suppliers see their goods sold off cheaply and the proceeds going to secured creditors (banks). It is also painful to see the Inland Revenue & VAT take preference over unsecured suppliers when the companies are finally liquidated.



Oh I forgot, there was one bit of good news. Alexandra won X Factor and I won £107. I thought it was too close to call as, although Alexandra was clearly better than JLS , I thought that JLS might have edged it as they have been very popular (I know Lauren and Marion both voted for them plenty of times) and they did have a great image. I left the bets so that it would be £107 even if it was the atrocious Eoghan. Won a couple of pounds on Chris Hoy winning SPOTY and I am now playing around on the Sunderland Manager market. Expecting the next Blackburn Manager market to be up and running soon. Might have a little flutter on Strictly on Saturday.



It's great to see Liverpool top of the league. Chelsea are still hot favourites but like us they are finding it hard to win at home.In fact a lot of teams have a better away record than home record this season. A win at the Emirates on Sunday would be massive.

Starting to get into the Christmas spirit I found this video at home the other day when we were digging out the decorations. I made it 26 years ago so that toddler Sarah could watch her favourite Chicaboo and Teddy on tv.

Special Offer Closed

Please note that yesterday's special offer has now closed.

One Day Opportunity To Hold Instanta Prices Until 1st March 2009

Yes, today Monday 15th December is special offer day at Instanta and the blog is devoted entirely to that offer.

As a customer you will have been notified of our price increases effective from 1st January 2009. We have deliberately kept these selective and as low as possible but they are necessary for the continued success of the business.

To qualify for our offer simply order a boiler from Instanta today for delivery before Christmas. Quote on your order SPECIAL BLOG OFFER and get the order to us before midnight tonight 15th December 2008. Make sure that you check for an acknowledgement of the order as email orders have a habit of disappearing into cyberspace. All qualifying orders will be acknowledged by 10:am on Tuesday 16th December.

Normal blogging will resume tomorrow.

Gratulacje i wszystkiego najlepszego z okazji urodzin Rafa

As 15th December's blog will be dedicated to a special sales offer I would like to offer early but warmest birthday greetings to Rafa Kolasinski who will be 28 on Monday. Rafa is from Kielce in Poland and joined our workforce in our finishing off department in August. He is a keen sportsman and football fan but can't make our five a side sessions due to his spending time studying English in college. Judging from his knowledge of English I suspect he is already top of the class. When not working and studying, Rafa also enjoys computers and makes regular use of video calls on Skype to his family back in Kielce. Everyone at Instanta wishes you a very happy day Rafa.



Is this a sign of the nanny society gone mad? Preston city council has decided to ban swearing in public by using this pathetic poster. "No Effin & Jeffin"? How quaint. OK I have an idea what the effin is getting at but jeffin? What's all that about? Jeff off Preston go and jeff yourselves and spend your money on something worthwhile.



Another customer gone into administration this morning. This one has been in existence for 125 years. If we're not careful we are in danger of reversing the industrial revolution inside six months.And if the US doesn't bail out the motor industry God help anyone who lives in Detroit. Better think about turning the garden into a vegetable plot. Oh well, as my mum says, "at least I've got my health". Blood pressure reading this morning 147/106. Hmmm. The drugs don't work. Well they do work but seem to run out of steam overnight.


Don't forget to log onto the blog on Monday. We will be making a special offer to allow you to hold Instanta 2008 prices until 1st March 2009.



In the meantime a very full weekend beckons. X Factor Final, Liverpool v Hull and a big pile of ironing. I've got a sneaky feeling that it's going to be JLS but a lot depends on how well their duet with Rhianna goes down. I'll sign off with another possibility for the Christmas karaoke.

We're Off Christmas Shopping

Yes, Marion and I are taking advantage of the Merseyrail £1 special offer tonight and rushing hot foot to the new Liverpool One shopping centre to do our Christmas shopping. Meanwhile the trains in the opposite direction will be packed with scousers heading for Southport for the Woolies closing down sale. I am sure that all the other shops in town will be over the moon at the thought of all the money being diverted into pick 'n' mix and I really feel for the 30,000 Woolies workers who will be spending Christmas on the dole. Marion has got a list of presents and we are sticking to it. No impulse buys. Mind you we won't be joining the million people who according to ITN have said that they would consider shoplifting their presents this year.



I have just read that Robert Mugabe says there is now no cholera in Zimbabwe. OK Robert here are a few more facts that you might have missed. There are no poor people in Zimbabwe. The shops in Zimbabwe are choc a block with food. And Zimbabwe inflation is currently running at 2%. Oh sorry Robert getting you mixed up with somewhere else. See your people are starving and you recently printed 100 billion dollar notes (not you printed 100, billion dollar notes, you printed 100 billion dollar notes). Dictators. Don't you just love em.



The riots in Greece are a bit worrying aren't they? Don't pretend it's all about the shooting of a kid by wayward police. It's what happens when you have a country full of educated people and no jobs and I forecasted riots several weeks ago. Problem was I didn't forecast them for Athens but somewhere a lot closer to home.Don't think this is a joke. When you have thousands joining the ranks of the unemployed every day it won't take long before they start to revolt.Woolies today, who knows tomorrow?

Here's another possible song for the Christmas karaoke.

Birthday Boys

Not just one but two birthdays to celebrate today. Firstly Sales Director Nick Neal is celebrating his 46th. Nick can always be relied upon to see the bright side of things and is seldom seen without a smile on his face. This can be uplifting in the current gloom and we are sure that he will have a wonderful day. Nick is currently top of Instanta Sports Pick The Score league where he has the user name Melvis. He tells me that this is because he has been mistaken for both Mel Gibson and Elvis and there was me thinking it was something to do with Mavis from Corrie and Elton John. Have a good day Nick.



Secondly the youngest member of the Instanta team turns 17 today. Joey Jones joined us recently and works two days a week spending the other days at college. He once had training as a stand up comedian and is planning a ten minute slot for our Christmas party in a week or two. Keen footballer Joey is an enthusiastic member of our weekly five a side get togethers and has put in some memorable performances. Have a good day Joey and make sure that you run that stand up script past me before you start.


With Christmas almost upon us we are busy preparing the holiday lists for next year. As the factory holidays run to over six weeks (when Christmas is taken into account) it is becoming a bit of a headache when anyone is off sick. So we have decided to close the factory for two weeks next year.One week in January and one in August This should free up the rest of the list and give everyone a better choice.



Has there ever been a more appropriate name for a protest group? We like to think that we are as green as anybody. We have had an environmental management system approved by BSI for many years but the action of Plane Stupid on Monday was just plain stupid. What right have they got to ruin holidays for hundreds or even thousands of people? These people may have been saving or planning their trips for months and may have struggled to raise the cash. The cancellation of their flights could have caused real misery at a time when things are already hard enough for a lot of families. I even heard one woman who missed her father's funeral vigil as a result of these idiots. It's action like this that makes me want to get all the tins, plastic bottles, glass bottles and newspapers that we have carefully segregated and put it in the bin. There's no point in anybody trying to sue them for their losses as none of them will have a penny.Bastards!

Well I got that off my chest so I'll finish with a short video for Joeys' birthday. Here's a stand up lesson from a very very young Adam Sandler.

A Visit From CaterQuotes

This morning we were delighted to welcome Stuart Campbell Managing Director of the UK Division of CaterQuotes pictured above with our Sales Director Nick Neal. Stuart gave an enlightening talk on the CaterQuotes Computer Software that is taking the industry by storm and very informative it was too. The system helps catering equipment suppliers to prepare complex and detailed quotes in a fraction of the time taken historically and in a highly professional format. We are pleased to be included in the manufacturers using CaterQuotes and you can find out more about it by clicking here



I just had a look at the details of the wonderful interest rate collar that we had to take out when we bought our building in May. Looks like we are now working on a margin above a base rate of 6.25%. Wonderful when base rate is actually 2%. But we can always cancel the deal. The cost? A mere £85,000. Now that's not a collar. That's a noose.



Marion had a huge backlog of work on her desk and came into the office early this morning to try and clear it. So I brought a bowl of porridge in for her when I came in. I had to drive carefully as I didn't want a boiling mess all over the car. It's brilliant that Oats So Simple. It makes perfect porridge every time and is just a two minute job. So much better than the old days, a pan, a stove and a stodgy lumpy mess.

As we start the countdown to Christmas I can't get over the number of people we meet who are being made redundant. Every day someone comes into the spares counter and tells us the bad news. The cashiers at the bank told me that there were loads cashing their final pay cheques last Friday and yesterday I went to get some Xmas decorations from the Pier and they are in administration. My son Paul was talking to me about this last weekend and he said "It's a cycle isn't it? You'll remember it happening like this before". Well, much as I am fond of spinning the "When I was a lad" line. I had to say "No". I really can't remember anything like it. Perhaps they all had those wonderful interest rate collars. It's no surprise that bankers have replaced wicked stepmothers in most of the pantos this year.

As we prepare for our Christams Karaoke lunch thoughts turn to what the hell have I let myself in for. It seems that traditionally the boss has to do the first turn. It's a good job we aren't having it in Sandakan Borneo. I don't know if you read it but a bloke was stabbed to death on Saturday for hogging the mic. I think its more likely that he was singing one of Eoghan Quigg's songs. Anyway I won't be going for the Karoake classics like My Way or You'll Never Walk Alone. Think I'll stick with something short, sweet and topical. Like this.

Please Don't Let It Be Chucky

It may sound like we have very boring Saturday nights but I have to say I like nothing better than a roaring log fire and Saturday night ITV on the telly and this weekend was no exception. We aren't alone. There were 10 million others tuning in and they had over 2 million phone votes which means that if you take off Marion's votes for Alex and JLS there were at least two other people voting. The excitement of the X factor far outweighs the thought of getting dressed up and going out. And I only wish that I had a camera to capture Marion's reaction to the result of her finger having been on the redial button for the last half hour. She was out of her seat ,punching the air and stamping her feet with the sort of enthusiasm normally seen on the Kop when Liverpool score (beginning to forget what that's like after Fulham and West Ham). Yes her beloved JLS who she is voting for because they are "cute" and Alex who she is voting for because she can sing were the first two names to go through leaving Eggnog and Diana to sweat it out. It was then that I realised where I had seen Eoghan before. Remember "Child's Play"? That right. Chucky. Of course it's no coincidence. Chucky-Egg.



----------------------Chucky From "Child's Play"-----------------------


-------------------------X Factor's Eoghan----------------------------

I must say that I share her enthusiasm as I win £120 on Betfair if either of them win (it will go towards the phone bill) although it's a few quid lost if its Chucky. A win may compensate for the loss of £150 on Joe Swash in I'm a Celebrtity. As he was one of the only contestants that I had never heard of I bet against him which just shows that I should be watching Eastenders on BBC rather than ITV. I have had a lot of fun on Betfair this year and have put £20 a week into the account. As the year comes to a close after fifty weeks of £20, I have got in the account er £1,000 (oh well you win some you lose some). Am going to put all that on Liverpool for the Premiership if we are still top on 31st December. In the meantime I won just £35 on the next Newcastle Manager and am having a dabble at the next Sunderland manager now. I really enjoy these manager markets. Don't win much but it's great reading all the gossip and blatant attempts to manipulate the market "My mate just saw Kevin Keegan in a restaurant with Niall Quinn" that sort of thing.



Back at work we are trying to avoid talking about the you know what and are only thinking positive. We took out a big loan in May to buy the building. With the recent cut in interest rates, technically we should now be about £2,000 a month better off but as the bank insisted on a complicated "collar" as illustrated above we are actually £2,000 a month worse off. As you might guess, we aren't exactly happy about this and, as the bank only told us about the condition after we had been given permission to bid at auction and were committed to buying the property, I think we have got a good case. The above example is worded in Lithuanian but , whilst ours was worded in English, the Lithuanian version would have made just as much sense. We will have to look at more ways of raising cash.

Looking at the photo of Lauren on Friday's blog, the thought occurs that we could call ourselves "Lapland" and charge £25 a head for everyone to come and look at our Christmas tree. It seems that fake Laplands are springing up everywhere and turn out to be muddy fields with a bit of tinsel and a fake Father Xmas. We can guarantee no mud and we have the real Father Xmas (have you seen our staff holidays?) plus the tooth fairy (Marion) and Lauren has two King Charles spaniels that do a mean husky impersonation.

I got a letter on Friday from a customer who said that he was not accepting our new price list. I thought this was a very good idea so I went into Tesco yesterday and when I got to the till I told them I was not accepting their prices. A very nice young man escorted me to the car park sans shopping. Seriously we don't implement price increases willy nilly. Our small increases have been selective and justifiable. Apart from our interest rate noose, we have a 4% staff pay increase to cover and huge increases on components imported from Italy and USA. And don't say we shouldn't have had a 4% pay increase, it is important to us that our staff are successful and enjoy their lives.

Oh well. Better get back to some work. Did a full analysis of the last 12 month's warranty work on Friday and am pleased to say that action has been taken to eradicate all of the faults that recurred more than a couple of times. Will leave you now with a message for next Saturday.

Getting Into The Holiday Spirit

Well its only a few weeks to go now so Lauren has decorated the Christmas Tree in our reception and lovely it is too. Next year we are going to step it up a bit and here are the lights that we aim to emulate.



Apologies for the advert for coke but the lights are great and well worth a look. And talking of coke did anybody see the new anti-coke public service films launched by the government yesterday and featuring Pablo the talking dog. Not only did the government come up with a talking dog (brilliant) but a talking dog that is dead? That's really special. Hmm might try some of that coke. Was going to put a YouTube link but the film is so crap despite a voice over by the brilliant David Mitchell that it's not worth it. That dog just looks stuffed and its mouth doesn't even move.

So instead of the anti coke video here is a linkto a Tory party political broadcast. Now, as a trendy lefty Guardian reader I shouldn't be linking to Tory propaganda on my blog but as the broadcast highlights Shane Prescott one of our neighbours on this industrial estate (look out for the gas tower. our factory is right next to it) I felt that I had to give it a plug. I feel very sorry for Shane's story in this broadcast as he has built up a highly reputable local building firm that works to a high standard. As for his and David Cameron's suggestion of a six month delay in paying VAT. I'd vote for that.

Good news from Gary Rodwell who tells me that his eye is on the mend. Here's a song for you to sing at the Christmas Karaoke Gaz.

And finally good luck to George Takei in tonight's final of IACGMOOH. If he gets to be George of the Jungle I win. Same with Martina but it's a big loss if its Joe Swash so I will wait until later and decide whether or not to chicken out.

Don't Speak Too Soon

Just as I breathed a sigh of relief that the damage inflicted on sheet metalworker Gary Rodwell's eye by my errant kicking of the ball during Tuesday night's five a side, was minor , I got the news that Gary (far right above) has no vision in that eye today. He has been to the doctor who has diagnosed bleeding behind the eye and signed him off for a week. If it is not clear by then, an operation may be necessary. I feel really bad about that and am keeping my fingers crossed that he will be ok. I am sure that everyone at Instanta will join me in wishing him a very speedy return to full vision.

I was disappointed to see that YouTube is making plans to sanitise its content and remove profanities etc. I think the following YouTuber's comments are pretty succinct and echo my feelings on the matter.





Betting on IACGMOOH has been a disaster. My usual policy of betting against the early favourite has worked against me as Joe Swash remains favourite with one day left so, barring a miracle I will lose out this time. I can cut my losses by betting against either George or Martina depending upon which one survives tonight. If both manage to pull through I should come through relatively unscathed but if the final three are David Van Day, Swash and one other I will lose. Serves me right for betting blind on this as I can't stand the programme and haven't watched it. Never mind I'm still in a winning position on X Factor and we've got Celebrity Big Brother soon!

This morning I did a statistical summary of the warranty work carried out in the last 12 months and am pleased to see that the number of jobs has remained steady despite an increase in boilers under guarantee. However it is interesting to see that our typical sub contractor's charge has risen by more than double the rate of inflation.

Lethal Weapon

You wouldn't think of a football as a lethal weapon but last night I almost managed to blind one of our staff by kicking the ball very hard into his face. Fortunately Gary Rodwell from our metal work department phoned later from hospital to say that he could now see although his vision is still a bit blurred today. Apologies Gary.I am very glad that it was not a detached retina. The match was abandoned at 10-10.



We had one of our regular R&D meetings yesterday and I am delighted with the progress that we are making with the sous vide equipment. Following the feedback from the first chef who is testing for us we are now making him a new unit with all his suggested tweaks and hope to get that to him next week. The second chef could only give us positive feedback and told us that he loved the partitions, the five timers, the temperature reading and the water movement. He said that he had been using a rival manufacturer's water bath for some time and that the accuracy of our unit was vastly superior. We are very pleased with this feedback and aim to launch the units in early spring. You may think that this is a long time after we exhibited a prototype at Excel in February but if something is worth doing, it is worth doing properly.



In addition to the sous vide our R&D team are also developing additions to our super range of under counter boilers. Sales of these units have been very encouraging and by summer next year we hope to have few more to boost the range.

Did you see that the Advertising Standards Agency has banned the DFS Nickelback ads? Not on the grounds of the fact that they are simply, completely and utterly crap but because it seems that the "singers" had been filmed singing against a screen and then superimposed onto the sofa settings. The results made the sofas look so much bigger than they are in reality. DFS are no strangers to blue screen technology as this wonderful Xmas ad from last year testifies.

Peter Hangs Up His Boots

Tuesday evenings just won't be the same again now that Pete Barlow (above far right) has had to hang up his boots.Storeman Peter has been playing since he could walk and once put three penalties past Joe Corrigan in a penalty shoot out at Goodison Park To say that Peter (47) is keen on football would be the understatement of the year and every game (be it as player or as supporter) is treated as a cup final with 100% commitment. My body still bears testimony to his passion for the game. A few months ago he knocked me off my feet and left me with a shoulder sprain which has still not quite healed (and that was just at the toss up). Recently, acting on doctor's orders, he played in goal and put in some great performances but the doc now says that football is completely off limits. Sorry to see you go Peter. You can always come and ref for us.

Still with football I suppose it was too much for me to hope yesterday that we would see Liverpool three points clear at the top of the league. Another nil nil against mid table opposition ,means that we now have a better away record than we have at Anfield. At least we are still top and what's to stop us staying there? I am sure that next time a team comes to Anfield and tries to win we will batter them. We just can't beat teams that come for a point.



Not a lot seems to be going right at the moment. We woke up this morning to see some ladders at the end of the garden. It turned out that the man who does some garden maintenance for us had come round yesterday to carry out some work that we asked him to do months ago. The instructions were to tidy up an ivy that has been growing over a small arch for about 15 years and to dig up a bush that has got out of hand. Very sadly for us gardener Eddie had got the instructions the wrong way around and somehow managed to remove the ivy completely leaving us with a very sorry looking archway. Fortunately he had not got around to the other plant. It's really sad to see a plant that has grown for so many years completely ruined in an afternoon.

Finally, we all know how dangerous it can be to cross the road without looking. But how dangerous can it be to cross and athletics long jump track without looking?

Back to work.

Back to work today and it's been quite hectic. Max is on holiday and poor Lauren is poorly again so, with it being the first of the month, it is turning into a very busy day. At the weekend it was great to see son Paul and his fiancee Josephine who made a flying visit. They work so hard and live so far away that we get very little chance to see them but it was great to have them stay for a couple of nights.

It was also great to see the famous ring that we had heard so much about and which left Paul being interrogated by his bank who felt that the charge looked out of place amongst a mass of debits for Domino's pizza and itunes.



Speaking of jewellery, this morning a spider left a beautiful free necklace on Marion's car.



Now that I am back at work, the top priority is to get the blood pressure back down. Despite doubling the dose of one of the pills, the reading is still higher than the doctor wants. Even though we are doing ok at work I can't help feeling that all the bad news that we keep reading, watching and listening to is stressing me out. Can we please have some good news. How about Liverpool 3 points clear at the top of the league at 10pm tonight. Maybe. Just maybe. Here's someone else who feels the same as me and whilst I don't agree with it all, the sentiment is in the right place.

Sorry Lucas

I was made to feel a bit guilty about my comments on Liverpool's young Brazilian Lucas Leiva last night. After writing on my blog that he wasn't very good on Saturday he came on as sub last night with about ten minutes left. The crowd gave him a huge and encouraging round of applause by way of support for a struggling player and I felt very bad about slagging him off. However with my recent high blood pressure and fifty quid riding on a Liverpool win it was a substitution I could have done without. Fortunately we hung on against a very impressive Marseille side and as for Lucas? Let's hope that next time he comes on there's only one minute left (and we are at least two up).



Into the last two days of the holiday now. This week has been more relaxing than last but with all the doom and gloom in the papers it hasn't exactly been the happiest fortnight. Today we have Woolies finally going under together with MFI. You have to wonder who is next? I feel a bit sorry for some of the big stores who have been having sales as I know a few people who have been taking stuff back that they bought pre-sale and then buying it again at the sale price. It's not really in the spirit of things is it? I thought the idea was that we are all in it together. Dunkirk spirit and all that or is it every man for himself? In which case God help us.




On the betting front I was pleased to see that favourite Joe Swash has drifted slightly in the IACGMOOH market. I lose over £200 if he wins so I want him to drift a lot more. My big problem is I can't bring myself to watch the programme as I honestly feel that it is cruel to animals. OK they are only grubs,eels, rats and maggots but if you are not a creationist your ancestors might have been one of those millions of years back.



We are off to the pictures this afternoon to see the Changeling. I like Clint Eastwood as a director and this looks like it could be a good film. In the meantime there is a big pile of ironing to be getting on with. No news from work is good news so maybe I'll get the blood pressure below 140/90 before we go back next week. In the meantime let's have some real bears playing ice hockey. Is this cruelty or are the bears having a good time? Wouldn't bet on it.