In Praise Of Orange Wednesdays

As I wait for recent photos from those whose praises I hope to sing in my final few weeks of blogging I'll spend a few minutes celebrating the wonderful Orange and their outstanding support for the film industry. Since I started writing this blog a few years ago I reckon that we have taken advantage of the Orange Wednesday two for one film offer in the region of ninety times. At about £7 a ticket that's a saving of £630 and that alone must be worth the subscription to their mobile phone network. In addition to the film offer you can also combine it with offers from others such as Pizza Express and make Wednesdays a great night out. And if the local Vue would pull their fingers out and start showing more than just the latest blockbusters we might have made it a hundred visits. Tonight the critics' highest rated film "The Kids Are Alright" about a lesbian couple and their children's involvement with their sperm donor father is not showing whilst "Burke & Hare" which averaged one star in the press is on several times. That means no trip this week.

The subject matter for "The Kids Are Alright" reminds me of the episode of Modern Family that we watched last night. Gay partners Mitchell and Cameron thought that they were bound to get the school of their choice for adopted daughter Lilly because, being gay and having an adopted ethnic child they ticked all the boxes for the school's diversity policy. On arriving for the interview they bumped into other parents competing for the scarce place - gay, mixed race, adopted and disabled - a sort of top trumps for school enrolment. Not very PC but extremely funny. Do try it.

Is that Bruce Willis with Sheryl Crow? No it's Gavin Ford our Assistant Director and Buyer who was delighted to oblige when Sheryl asked for a photo recently. Gavin is on holiday this week and will be jetting off to the Canaries for a well earned break and will be celebrating his birthday today. Gavin has been with Instanta for over twenty three years and, after working in the assembly department, progressed to running the engineering workshop before becoming our buyer and working on R&D and our Quality and Environmental systems.  Gavin is engaged to partner Julie and plans to wed in the future. Proud father to son Nick, Gavin enjoys motor bikes and supporting the St Helens Rugby League team. This will be his last birthday before I leave so thank you Gavin for your support over the past twenty odd years, happy birthday and best wishes for the future.


I mentioned political correctness earlier. There is so much going on in the world today that I would love to comment upon here. But we don't own Instanta any longer and it would not be politically correct or respectful of me to do so as I am sure that politics, world issues and my slightly weird left of centre, right of centre mix of thoughts have no place on somebody else's website. However, when we leave, I do hope to continue some sort of "thoughts from a retired bloke" blog in which nothing will be sacred and anything will go. I'll post a link for anybody who may be interested before we go.


In the meantime I'll keep it anodyne. Have you heard about the return of Alan Partridge? Hallelujah.

All Quiet On The Factory Front

With the factory on holiday it's quiet in here this week with no throbbing and banging from machinery and no loud voices discussing the latest football news. Except for the lathe department that is. Due to staff sickness last week we got a little behind in the machine shop and Craig Mercer (left) and Steve Eyres volunteered to work the holiday to help us catch up. Thanks lads. That means that when everyone is back next week they won't be short of parts to get the production line rolling again.



Whileit is peaceful, buyer Gavin Ford has taken the opportunity to arrange the packaging for the new products with our packaging suppliers BJ Eurosell. Here is Eurosell's Jim Jackson (right) with Gavin. We have been using this great family run business since 1989 and they supply all our boxes and insulation. The fact that the family are all Liverpool fans has nothing to do with our supporting them (but it helps).



Speaking of Liverpool FC, the reds are in action tonight at Wolverhampton Wanderers. Will it be another true grit performance like the one against Spurs last week or will we be back to our dire worst like we were against Portsmouth? The Guardian had most of a page devoted to a rumour that Rafa is going to manage Juventus. I don't really have a lot of time for the rumour mill but The Guardian has an uncanny knack of getting these things right.The Gary Neville survey ended up with 88% of Guardian readers agreeing that he is a sock sucking moron - so it's a paper you can trust.



I won't be watching Liverpool tonight as they are not on TV but tomorrow it's Orange Wednesday and we might get the chance to take in a film. We still haven't seen Avatar. As it's going to be the biggest box office hit of all time I think that we should see it but, although I don't know why, it doesn't really appeal. (We still haven't seen that other Cameron blockbuster Titanic yet). We haven't seen Sherlock Holmes either so maybe that will be the choice.



I spotted a fabulous Japanes vase on the internet the other day with an estimate of just £100. Having several pieces by the same artist in my collection, I knew that the estimate was way off the mark and asked if I could have a telephone bid. Sadly I was not alone and the price soared way above my limit and I had to take another call before the hammer came down. In the days before auctions were listed on the internet things like this could be bought cheaply (even today the top bid in the room was only £180)but now that collectors worldwide can search for "sleepers" they are becoming few and far between. I suppose that the best bet for antique collectors is to drive around the country and seek out auction houses who haven't gone on line yet.

Did you hear about the survey that came out today withe the news that Britain is finally more tolerant towards gays and unmarried couples. Where Instanta leads, Britain follows. We've tolerated just about everything here for the last twenty years. Here's a short video on the subject.

10:10 Our Commitment Starts Now

In an attempt to do our bit for global warming, Marion and I are now proud owners of a Toyota Prius. We've only had it for a few days and have only driven some short journeys but it looks like it's going to give us some good fuel consumption figures. One thing that is very noticeable is the engine noise (or lack of it). When driving on the battery the car is virtually silent. One thing that attracted me to the car was the automatic parking assist which allows the car to reverse park itself (if you've ever seen my attempts at reverse parking you will know what an asset this could be). Only problem is I can't work out how to use it yet. I'll have a practice in the car park here later and see if I can manage.



How things have changed. I remember Christmases past when the kids were eagerly anticipating the arrival of Father Christmas with all the latest gadgets whilst sad old mum and dad got something for the kitchen. This year the tables were completely turned with Sarah and Paul buying us a Nintendo Wii whilst we were giving them stuff for their kitchens. The Wii is good but you have to stand well clear of Marion or a black eye is a real possibility.



Shortly before we shut down for the Christmas break I reported that buyer Gavin had proposed to his partner Julie but illustrated the news with an inappropriate photo of Gav in shorts outside a beach bar. But now we've got something a bit more like it. Here are the happy couple in front of a romantic Caribbean sunset. What a glamorous pair they make.



Marion and I came into the office during the holidays. Marion tidied up the books whilst I wrote a newsletter that we're sending out very soon. It's all about prices for 2010. They come into effect on 1st March. We've managed to keep the increases to a minimum and any big price hikes will be matched by a corresponding improvement in features. From 1st March our CT and WM range will offer programme upgrades that will be in keeping with the 10:10 initiative. We'll tell you more soon.Here is a sneak preview of the prices. There are a few gaps, it's a work in progress.



It's freezing today. I hope the car park is not too icy to try the parking assist. And I hope the Prius holds the road better than this.

It's Good News Week

Love is in the air at Instanta this week. Our machine tester Andy Fyles (above) got down on one knee at the weekend and asked his partner Claire to marry him. And the good news for Andy was that she said yes and wedding bells are going to chime in 2011.Congratulations Andy and Claire.



And there was more good news for assistant director and buyer Gavin Ford as he too proposed to his long term partner Julie. Gavin popped the question whilst on his luxury Caribbean cruise on board the Ventura and Julie gave him the answer he wanted to hear and there will be more wedding bells in 2011.



And even more good news came yesterday when we checked our lottery syndicate tickets for December. Here is Tony from our stores with our cheque for £2,763 which left all members with a payout of £132.59 for the year. OK it's not a life changing sum but, after my moaning earlier in the year that the syndicate never wins anything it was nice to get back £84 more than we paid in this year. Tony also manages our bonus ball competition. We pay £1 per week and all have an allocated number. Being a statistician, I reckon that everyone's number should come up once a year but the truth is that 12 members' numbers have not come up once whilst others' have come up several times. Luckiest on the bonus ball this year was Peter Brindle who managed to win almost ten weeks' worth of bonus ball contributions. Well done Peter (lucky ****)



We didn't get to Vue the other night as the weather was freezing and the warm lounge was inviting. Marion said that there was a film called "The Uninvited" on Sky. Have we seen it? "No " I said. "I'm pretty sure that we haven't". And we hadn't but five minutes into the film it all seemed very similar and we realised that we had seen the Korean version. Oh well never mind,it beat a trudge through the snow.And speaking of snow, daughter Sarah braved the elements to drive back to St Andrews yesterday. We told her not to do it but are glad that she did as she had no traffic problems whereas the roads in Scotland are almost impassable today.

It's very quiet here. The factory closed yesterday but we workers in the office are still hard at it. We'll be closing at lunchtime tomorrow. I'm putting a note on the blog for emergency cover for the three non holiday days next wee. Hopefully there will be few calls as we have had a good year for warranty call outs.

And remember, a peregrine falcon is for life not just for Crimbo.

Rafa Rafa Sign Him Up

We Liverpool fans have been a bit short of goals recently with Fernando Torres being sidelined with a hernia. But here's an ideal replacement, Rocky Baptiste. Marvel at his skills.

Meanwhile, out in the factory, Operations Director Dave Wilson is working around the clock getting the new models ready for photography tomorrow.He's on time at the moment and we should be able to slot the photos into the new brochure next week and be well on time for publication in February.


We worked late on some accounts last night (don't die of shock we have been known to work after 5pm from time to time). As it was late, Marion and I decided to buy some fish and chips from the chippy near the factory on the way home. The lady in the shop was really nice. I ordered two fish and a portion of chips. As she piled the chips onto the paper, I was looking around the shop to see if another customer had come in and ordered chips for the whole street but no, I was alone, and the mound grew bigger and bigger. The chips were delicious but half of them ended up in the bin. The single portion could easily have fed five. As I left the shop a number of her regulars waddled in to a jovial welcome and I made an instant decision to leave fish and chips off the menu for quite some time.



Here's our buyer Gavin looking very happy. And he has good reason for this time tomorrow he will be somewhere over the Atlantic on his way to Barbados where he and his partner Julie are joining a two week Caribbean island cruise. Have a great time Gav (Is it possible to write through gritted teeth?).

A Belated Happy Birthday Gav

I was away visiting a customer yesterday (yes I do work sometimes) so I missed reporting our buyer and assistant director Gavin Ford's birthday. Gav has been with Instanta for longer than I have so that's over half his life. He started on the shop floor and then set up our own lathe department. Following that, he went on to gain a university degree in engineering and learned how to operate our latest CNC lathes before moving into the office role of buyer. Gavin is responsible for all our purchases and he also plays a big part in the running of our BSI approved quality and environmental management systems. Proud father to Nick, Gav has the longest Instanta journey to work travelling in daily from Horwich where he lives with his partner Julie.Outside work, Gav is a keen fan of St Helens rugby league club and a regular off road motorcyclist. Congratulatons Gav.



I got my book printed for family and friends and the copies arrived today. I'm very pleased with it and hope that people enjoy it. If you get a copy don't worry, you don't have to read it!I got the copies done on the espresso book machine at Blackwell's in London. They offer a great service and give amateur authors like me a chance to have their work professionally presented. My book is on the Harper Collins authonomy web site. I've had some good comments and feedback but I don't think I'm going to retire on it.



We've been done. We've fallen victims to what is known as a "long firm fraud". This is a fraud where an apparently legitimate business is set up and then goods are ordered and not paid for. You might say "that's not fraud, that's just business" but no, this was a deliberate con. The "customer" set up as a wholesaler and provided us with apparently legitimate references. We followed these up carefully and opened the account with a £2,000 credit limit. The first order came in last week and we sent the goods out but then a second order came just a couple of days later. Marion and I were away but Jenny was suspicious and asked us about it. Marion put her Miss Marple hat on and within half an hour was pretty sure that we had been done. She managed to trace two more victims who told her exactly the same story. We contacted the police who acted with commendable speed in this instance and found a warehouse full of stuff. Whether or not our four 1500 boilers are there or not we are waiting to find out. This is the second time that we have been victims to this con in the last ten years. Maybe we'll learn one day but these people are so convincing and the set up is elaborate.



A big night for my team Liverpool tonight. If we lose to Lyon we are going to be out of the Champions League during the league stages for the first time in ages.I can't say that I am 100% confident that we'll win but Rafa says we'll do it so that's OK then.It must be a big match. I'm giving up my regular Orange Wednesday cinema trip.

I was just watching the lads using the fork lift truck in the factory. They're pretty good at driving it. Here's someone who was not quite so good.