Brrrrrrrrrrr

Don't know about you but me and Marion are sitting here shivering today. We haven't got the heating on at Instanta yet (you know we are very green)but it just seems so chilly. Maybe we'll have to get it switched on soon. In the meantime we've got our coats on and I keep looking at the photo at the top of the blog and wishing we were back in Italy.



Bad news on the shop floor as our super Finn Power green punch press (yes I know it's blue but it's also very green) is on the blink. It's only five years old (which is young for a machine like this) but it seems that the on board computer keeps throwing a wobbler. As with all intermittent faults it's proving very difficult for engineers to spot the cause but they're coming next week and will see if they can solve the mystery. In the meantime we are getting as much as possible made on it while it is still up and running.



Sales are running well at the moment with the 1500LCDs going out of the door as soon as they are built. Have a think about trying the CT2000. It has a two year guarantee, full service diagnostics and an energy saving eco mode (which is going to be so important in years to come).



As you can see, there's been no expense spared with our stand for The Restaurant Show at Earls' Court in London next week when Nick and Craig (above) are going to be showing our superb sous vide equipment on the CEDA stand. We've got a square metre of space so as long as Craig and Nick squeeze close together they should be OK.They're sharing a bedroom too. Cheapskates us? There's a recession on.

I'll finish to day with a fun viral. OK it's a deliberate plug for Volkswagen but it's an interesting take on how to encourage people to take more exercise by using the stairs instead of the escalator.

Eating Humble Pie

No sooner had I written yesterday's blog in which I berated the people who keep letting our sales team down than a smart young salesman presented himself at our reception. "I've got an appointment with x" he said. "Oh." we said "X is ill". Oh dear I had better find a big hole to hide in. Mind you I did talk to him for a while and see if I could help and he said he had not come out of his way and could easily come back next week from his base .................... in John o Groats.



Our buyer and assistant director Gavin brought his son Nick in to see us after school. Nick had decided to cut his fringe all by himself. We think it's very fetching Nick and it might well catch on. Vidal Sassoon watch out.



Instead of Orange Wednesday last night we stayed at home and watched "When Boris Met Dave" on More 4. As our son Paul went to the same college as Boris I was hoping to see some shots that brought back memories but the budget didn't run to using the real locations. It was an interesting drama doc and the best bits were the talking heads, particularly James Delingpole who affected to be a toff and wandered around Oxford carrying a teddy bear like Sebastian in Brideshead. It's a bit scary to see that the Mayor of London and the man who might be the next prime minister were members of a society that used to pretend to ride along Oxford's streets on imaginary horses......... whilst dressed in tailcoats.



Our fabulous brochure is into its last few months now as the wonderful Workhouse Marketing send me a mock up of the proposed new one. First impressions are good so we should be able to get cracking with it soon.


I'll finish today with a BBC reporter who should get a medal for bravery.

I'm really sorry but I can't make the appointment.

It's only ten or so words isn't it? But just think how much trouble and money you could save Instanta if you picked up the phone and said them.We know and understand that accidents happen,cars get stuck in jams and people get ill but our sales team has had so many instances of turning up to be met with "sorry he's out" lately that I am beginning to wonder if simple courtesy has disappeared. Our sales force cover large swathes of the country and often have to stay overnight in order to keep to the schedule that they have booked.I'm not accusing all our customers, as plenty do have the courtesy to tell us, but please don't think "I'm only seeing a rep". Your cancellation has cost us dearly and you have also missed the opportunity to find out about how Instanta can earn you money.



We've scanned the Vue cinema listings for today but have either seeen or have no wish to see everything that's on offer. So, to keep with the Orange Wednesday theme, we're going to treat ourselves to some beans on toast and eat it in front of the telly and watch a good film on Sky (if there is one that we've not seen).



We'll go to the gym first as we've missed it a lot lately. Since I was diagnosed with the need for a hip relacement I've had to limit the activities but I need to keep active and if I set the seat on the gym bike at the right level I can manage to get some exercise. If I set it at the wrong level I can go through absolute hell.



A big thank you and well done to Northern Sales Manager Peter Brindle who has just landed an order for 60 DB2000 boilers. That's a great order by anyone's standards and it's all down to Peter's tenacity and devotion to a lead. (Better not big him up too much or he'll be asking for a bonus.)


Someone gave me a link to this video. You know what it's like, your team is trailing with seconds to go and the goalkeeper comes up to join in the attack. But for once the keeper shows that he is more than just an extra body in the penalty area. What a pity it didn't quite go in.

The Accountants Are Coming

I just had a phone call from our auditor Alan Finch of Moore Stephens letting me know that his arrival for the annual audit is imminent.We always enjoy Alan's visits.He is such a warm and friendly personality and could not be more removed from the stuffy image that accountants are sometimes given.Yes he's a great guy (apart from supporting Everton that is).



Natalie Drummond paid us another visit the other day and brought Olivia in. It's hard to believe that one of the Instanta babies is an Instanta toddler already but, as you can see, she is. And doesn't she look like her mum?

We had a phone call this morning from a customer who said that their boiler was not hot enough and that it had to deliver water at 100 degrees to satisfy health and safety requirements.(Health and safety requirements that we've never heard of). I can understand the confusion as the word "boiler" obviously implies "boiling" but there are no atmospheric boilers on the market that deliver boiling water. If they did, every canteen, kitchen or office using one would be full of steam.We'd like to label our units as "water heaters" but for the last thirty years (at least)all products like this have been called boilers and we don't want to make the move unilaterally.If you want boiling water you need to buy a pressure boiler.



Anybody out there know of any properties available to let in E London? One of my family is having a hell of a job trying to find somewhere suitable. They spend hours on the Internet making a list of suitable properties and then phone to arrange viewings and what's the answer? "Oh that one's already let". They make appointments to view and does the agent turn up? No. It's a minefield but decent two bed flat or house (preferably not modern)totally reliable tenants, E1 E2 E3 E14 anyone?



It seems that all the lads here at Instanta are keen on using the Internet but, unlike the office workers who can use it at their desks during breaks and lunchtimes, they can't get online in the factory. So we're looking into getting a wireless set up in the canteen so that they can use it during lunch when someone else is hogging the dart board or the pool table.

Today's the day that we decide on our Orange Wednesday film for this week. Not a big choice this time but I am looking forward to when this one comes out.

Man United Ruined My Accumulator

Was there ever a more bittersweet statement than that. Every week I make a donation to the coffers of Betfair and in return they let me forecast the outcome of between six and eight football matches in return for dreams of riches. And every week I forecast between five and seven of those matches correctly but hardly ever do I get them all right. This week was no exception but as the results at Newcastle and Sheffield came in I was, for once, starting to feel confident as I was sure that AZ Alkmar, Braga and Barcelona would do the business later on (which they did). That left just the mighty Man U against the minnows of Sunderland. And I didn't even have the pleasure of seeing them lose. As, of course, the obligatory injury time goal went in.




Nick tells me that his great new business idea has not brought results yet. Give it time Nick, give it time. I have put a link on Grannies Reunited.




I spent five hours editing my novel yesterday. My professional critic thought that it jumped around a bit too much so I have been cutting chapters and pasting them in other places to try an make a more even flow. The big problem then is continuity. For example one character has a disability caused by a long past accident. Have I mentioned it by Chapter six? No? Damn. Rewrite of Chapter six needed.



When I haven't time to get into writing the novel I've been spending a lot of time on Harper Collins Authonomy website. Here you can upload your book and let others criticise or praise it.Those who support the books which become most popular get points and rise up the charts as "Talent Spotters". I have somehow managed to get myself to number 63 in the Talent Spotter chart. I don't think that I am in a position to criticise but I certainly think I can tell if a book is readable or not.


I must thank our expert photographer Peter Raymond for giving me this link. He knows how I feel about bankers.

Blogger's Block

It's a bit like writer's block I suppose but at least when you are writing a book or an article or something to go in the next super Instanta brochure you can walk away for a couple of hours and seek inspiration. But a blog? It's supposed to be a daily thing, something immediate and vital. "Since when has the Instanta blog ever been vital?" I hear you ask.But as I sit staring at a blank screen I feel ike a man on death row. My time is running out. (Sorry I've just reread that I don't feel ike. I don't know any Ike's and if there are any out there I don't want to feel them).

I've got to get the blog up before midday or there's little point in blogging.

But hang on a minute. The screen's no longer blank. There's a whole paragraph of drivel and now there's this. Every time I touch the keypad the words move a little further along the screen.

Gigolos for the older woman. " Now what is he talking about?" you ask. Well Nick just came in and said to me he had a great new business idea. I'm not sure who he had in mind (certainly not me looking at my photo on yesterday's blog when I looked like a Belsen survivor) but here he is.

What do you think? Has it got legs? "Has he got legs?" I hear you ask. Oh well. That filled up another bit of white space.



We're off to Manchester to do some shopping tomorrow. Now there's some interesting news. That's equal to - we watched the telly last night or I had Fruitful for breakfast. Tap tap. Is there anybody still there?






I know. I'll tell you about our lucky competition winner. Yes Bruno Gautier of The Hare Restaurant in Hungerford won one of our wonderful SV25 sous vide digital water baths in the recent competition in Caterer and Hotelkeeper. Trouble is Bruno doesn't know yet as the restaurant is closed until next week. Well Bruno if you do any of that vanity Googling that our Nick loves so much (or is that vanity Gigoling now?), maybe you'll discover that you are the winner. I did send an email but if Bruno's spam filter is anything like ours a message headed "Congratulations You have Won" will be mouldering away with a pile of emails trying to sell him acai berries or male organ enhancers.

Our friend Amanda Sweeney from the wonderful City Servicing sent me this video. She reckons that her husband Dave reckons this is her. Now a radical liberal like me would never make such claims but as it was sent to me by a woman I feel safe (sort of) posting it.Have a good weekend.

Some Photos For The Kids

There you are Sarah.I always do as I'm told. X





And Paul. It's really good isn't it now that I've downloaded the software from the website?



Back at Instanta another month begins and I've just done the CEDABOND figures.In case you don't know, CEDABOND is a group of catering equipment dealers who get together to buy as a consortium. Although our sales to the group are a little down on last year for the first nine months of 2009 it was pleasing to see September around 30% up on last September.Thanks members.



Orange Wednesday last night was Creation. If you could sum a film up in one word, the word for this film is "melancholy". I think the poster is a bit of a cheat though. They've chosen exotic beach shots that make you think of Darwen's trips to the Galapagos but the film is almost exclusively set in a wet England. Mind you I suppose a colourful beach will put more bums on seats than a dark study. Marion thought it was good. I thought it was ....er.... well.... melancholy.



I had to laugh this morning when I asked Factory Leader Tony Mercer if we had hit our September production target. As Tony so often tells us, we don't hit September because that's when he has his holidays, but we did this year (sort of). We've just modified the fill elbow on the 1500LCD. This meant a different polystyrene insulation section was needed for the lid. We had some pieces the correct size but they were too thick so it looked like we would miss the target. But Steve Eyres, ever the innovator, solved the problem by driving over the over-thick poly in the fork lift truck. Don't laugh (even though I did). It worked! They don't call us "the innovators" for nothing.



With all the news of Mao's 60th anniversary on TV last night I noticed something unusual. When I was a kid everyone pronounced his name "Mowtsy Tung" but last night Sophie Rayworth on the BBC ten o'clock news kept calling him "Mousy Dung". Which is it "Mowtsy Tung" or "Mousy Dung"? There's only one way to find out!



Praise the Lord. Harry is back a week on Saturday.Which reminds me that the real X Factor is also back at the weekend after this year's lousy new format auditions stage. Marion and I both agree that our early choice Joe is in with a great chance and I'll be very surprised if he doesn't come through Boot Camp.