Sick As A Parrot

I've been watching Britain's Got Talent this week. Well, not really watching rather reading the newspaper with it on in the background and the laptop in front of me. When this bloke , Paul Burling, came on last night, he was described as an impressionist so I glanced up to watch his act. Apart from Harry Hill, I had no idea who any of his impressions were of so I laid him (bet against him)£10 to win the competition at odds of 15-1 (leaving me with a potential liability of £140).I was confident that he would lose and we would never see him again so thought it was £10 for nothing. Imagine my surprise when I tuned in later to see that not only was he still in the competition but he had WON his semi final.I can't see him winning the final so I am not that worried about the £140 but if an act like this can get to the final my comment on the show the other day becomes even more valid. Come on ITV and be realistic if you bring this back next year "Britain's Got No Talent" would make a better title.



And talking about being as sick as a parrot, did you read about the drunken parrots in Australia. I am indebted to the Independent's website for the following:-"In Australia's northernmost city it is not the people who are behaving like drunks, but the native parrots, which are falling out of the sky. Darwin's red-collared lorrikeets are suffering from a puzzling condition, with symptoms strikingly similar to those that accompany inebriation. Hundreds have been treated in animal hospitals, where they are fed sweetened porridge and fresh fruit – the avian equivalent of a hangover cure.In recent weeks the brightly coloured birds have been observed falling out of trees, stumbling around the streets and crash-landing when they attempt to fly. Those recovering in hospital are said to be dishevelled, disoriented and grumpy. Above all, they seem to shun bright lights and to experience an overwhelming desire for a good lie-down." The Aussie vets have not got to the cause of the problem yet but eating fermenting fruit seems to be high on the list of possibilities.



There's very little chance of Marion and me getting drunk in view of the diet that we are on at the moment although we are eating plenty of (not fermented)fruit. Three weeks into the diet and my record reports that we have each had three units of alcohol in total. Only about three months to go to reach the target. We seem to be doing OK but I won't be telling you about our progress until we have concrete figures to report.We are having a small party in a couple of weeks and the diet will have to be suspended for a day.



I just went onto the Liverpool FC website to read the latest news about Rafa Benitez. The press is full of reports that he has been offered £3m to leave. But the Liverpool site? Nothing, nada, silence. I had a quick look at how much the season ticket is going to be next year but, surprise ,surprise they haven't decided yet. Maybe they're waiting to see how much it costs to get rid of Rafa and we mugs will have to pay for it. I, for one, won't lose any sleep if Rafa goes. Last season was the worst I can remember with us playing the most boring football ever.